What she wore: black capris, long-sleeve purple tee, black leather thong sandals. The kids HATED my shoes, but the other teachers all loved them. Well, the women teachers.
When I first got word that I would be featured, I was very excited: so many people would be reading my blog. I was sure that I would get tons of interesting comments.
The reality of being featured is a lot different. My traffic was WAY up, but most of my comments were from regulars with a few newbies sprinkled here and there.
I just checked the results and it looks as if I will have the least popular blog of the week. This is a bit of a blow to my ego. I find myself wondering why my blog isn’t interesting. Is the layout unattractive? Do they hate my picture? Or, worse yet, do they find me boring and uninteresting? That’s a lot ponder. Especially for someone who far prefers contemplating how to squeeze more outfits out of her budget.
I was thinking maybe I shouldn’t be doing this. Maybe my blog is a pile of crap. But, I decided to think about what the blog does for me. This blog has been a lifeline for me with my husband away in another country. I feel connected to the world and amazingly interesting people have stopped by and left their thoughts. I’ve received words of encouragement when I needed them, and found strength in the trials of others.
Also, this blog has helped me in other ways. I love to communicate, but I’ve always been a talker. Now, I am starting to find my voice as a writer. Ok, writer may be a bold word, but I’m learning to communicate in a new way–in print. You can’t hear my voice or see my wacky hand motions. Only my words can be read.
So, people aren’t crazy about the school marm in the inner-city school. Maybe that’s a little too Dangerous Minds for their tastes. Well, I’m not Michelle Phipher and this isn’t a Blockbuster movie. I’ll just think of myself as an indie film–not for everyone, but something worth checking out.
Wow, I got some ‘splainin’ to do. This was not intended as a pity-party of a blog entry. I looked at it as affirming. I don’t need the majority’s vote–I need MY vote. In the end, blogging is about putting your two cents out there–if someone gets it, great, if not, so be it. At least you let your voice be heard. I’m doing great, I just wanted to share my thoughts as a crappatorian (the worst of the best). I’m not crying or anything–just acknowledging my feelings.