I had a nice, thoughtful post planned for today, but SO many people wanted to know where my question came from. Since I’m fairly certain nobody reads on the weekends, I figured no time like the present.
Two days ago I found myself in the situation I presented in yesterday’s post. I have been trained by my mother to wrap all sanitary napkins (it’s amazing the amount of euphemisms there are in the land of poop) in toilet paper, therefore creating a present of pads, if you will. So, usually when I have a “paper problem” I simply unwrap one of the presents and use that toilet paper. This time, however, someone had actually emptied the trash. May want to take cover because that is sure a sign of the impending apocalypse. Anyway, I had no recourse. I pulled my pants up right under my butt and ran across the house. I pulled them up some, so I wouldn’t fall down, but the waddle-run across the house struck me as one of the funniest things EVER. Later, I’m telling my husband the story and he says, You mean there could be poop drippings on the carpet? There are, of course, no poop drippings. I’m upset that I even have to type the words, but I started to wonder—did I handle that right? Is that what normal people would do, or am I some kind of freak? No better place to find out if you’re a freak or not than the internet.
I was actually surprised my the sheer number of people who didn’t pull up their pants. We have laundry, don’t we? I’d also like to give a shout-out to DavidShag who admitted to using his underwear as toilet paper—THAT’s innovative thinking.
Tomorrow, I’ll be back to my usual, lady-like self. I swear.