I’m such a spaz

What She Wore: Peach and white printed short-sleeve top with key-hole neckline and empire waist; white denim capris; strappy peach sandals with a one-inch heel.  My Lord, my feet swelled today–it’s like I had two sausages tied up with string. 


This originally started as an e-mail to my friends since it is far too disgusting to share with the general pubic, but hey, when have I ever been above disgusting?  Besides, I promised some potty humor. 
 
Feel free to laugh at me. . .
 
I had childbirth class this  past weekend, so now I have baby on the brain.  I’m examining every little twinge to make sure it’s not a contraction even though I still have several weeks to go. 
 
ANYWAY
 
The other day I went to the bathroom, came back to class, and after a few minutes I realized I had a big wet spot on the back of my pants.  I panicked.  I thought that my water had broken early (this is extremely rare and almost never happens, but no matter!).
 
I RUN to the bathroom, and start bending over this way and that trying to get a better look at "the spot."  Finally I determine that I will have to take off my pants so I can sniff the wet spot.  This is disgusting, but that’s what they tell you to do.   Have you ever tried to take off your pants in a little bathroom stall while wearing heels?  It’s no easy task.  Not to mention being eight months pregnant which throws off your balance a bit.  After getting them off, I got a whiff of something very familiar–toliet bowl cleaner. 
 
You see, the maternity shirt I wore  had a tie around the waist and the ends hang down in the back.  Apparently, one of these pieces ended up in the toliet and then got water all over my pants.  Disgusting, yes, but a complete relief.
 
Told you I was a spaz.
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About takedeux

In one summer I had a baby who was hospitalized for five weeks, quit my job, and moved back to my hometown. This blog is about starting over.
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17 Responses to I’m such a spaz

  1. Hilary says:

    I am laughing so hard!  However, I\’m also in shock that you are eight months pregnant.  Where has the time gone, I remember when you announced your pregnancy!!!  When is your due date???  Wow, the time is flying by!

  2. Jennifer says:

    Hey, at least it smelled of toilet bowl cleaner and not… grosser things. 🙂

  3. Stacy says:

    You are hilarious.  And also very brave.  Had I done that I would never admit it to anyone.  LOL
     
    -S.

  4. Becca says:

    Wow KM you are closer than I thought! Time is flying by, at least for me! Hey stuff happens! At least you can laugh at it now and not be embarasses because I am sure it has happened to other people too!
    Hugs,
    B

  5. Joell says:

    Thanks for making me laugh today!  That totally sounds like something I would do!! 
    If you are eight months preg and still able to bend over, you should be proud!  Rock on!

  6. Carol says:

    That\’s so funny.  Especially the image of an eight months pregnant you wrestling off your pants in the stall.  It sounds like your pregnancy is going great…the baby will be here before you know it.  You go girl!  

  7. Christi says:

    That was very literal potty humor!  I was laughing out loud when I read that.  I can only imagine trying to manuever oneself in such a way as to smell the back of your pants in a bathroom stall with a huge belly.  Thanks for the laugh.  I really needed that today.  And be proud of the ability to laugh at yourself and share it with others.  That is a character trait to be proud of!

  8. Unknown says:

    You\’re 8 months already?  Holy cow!  I can\’t believe how quickly it has gone – well, for ME anyway!  Sorry about the "incident" with the toilet bowl cleaner.  We all have stuff like that happen to us at least once…or twice…God bless 🙂

  9. Betty says:

    Hi KM,
     
    It seems like only yesterday you announced your pregnancy – an now you are in your eighth month?  There is nothing disgusting about life and its vagaries.  It is what it is and I always you think you are very brave to share the bad with the good.
     
    Betty

  10. Tracy says:

    Hahaha, well I\’m glad that\’s all it was!! And I can\’t believe it\’s getting so close to baby time!!

  11. Unknown says:

    This was too cute and SO true!  Been there done that, don\’t feel bad!

  12. Aimee says:

    that is way too funny…
    :o) smiles are free and contagious…so pass one right now to the people you love and those you don\’t…soon everyone will be smiling… :o)

  13. Jaysey says:

    LOL!  Good one!

  14. Antonella says:

    LOL!! ONe of my friends thought her water broke, she went to the hospital and it didn\’t!! It was pee! The baby kicked her right in the bladder!
     
    I can\’t even imagine how hard it would be moving with a little baby. Just make sure you rest up. I was surprized how much work labor was!!
    take care of yourself!
    Antonella

  15. g says:

    lol…when my water broke, my husband made me go the doctor cuz he refused to take me to the hospital of i "just peed my pants."
     Hope you are enjoying your long weekend.
     
    . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .* . . . . . . . . . . .*. . . . . . . ** * . . . . .. . . . . .*** . . * . . ***** . . . . . . . . . . .** . . **. . . . .* . . . . . . . . . . ***.*. . *. . . . .* . . . . . . . . . .****. . . .** . . . ****** . . . . . . . . . ***** . . . .**.*. . . . . ** . . . . . . . . .*****. . . . . **. . . . . . *.** . . . . . . . .*****. . . . . .*. . . . . . * . . . . . . . .******. . . . .*. . . . . * . . . . . . . .******* . . .*. . . . .* . . . . . . . . .*********. . . . . * . . . . . . . . . .******* . *** *******. . . . . . . . .** .*******. . . . . . . . * . ******. . . . . . . . * * . .***. . *. . . . . . .** . . . . . . .*. . . . . * . . . . .****.*. . . .* . . . *******. .*. .* . . .*******. . . *. . . .*****. . . . * . . .**. . . . . .* . . .*. . . . . . **.* . . . . . . . . . ** . . . . . . . . .* . . . . . . . . .* . . . . . . . . .* . . . . . . . . * . . . . . . . . * . . . . . . . . * . . . . . . . . * . . . . . . . . * . . . . . . . .(¯`v´¯). . . . . . . .`*.¸.*´. . . . . . . .¸.•´¸.•*¨) ¸.•*¨). . . . . . . .(¸.•´ (¸.•´ .•´ ¸¸.•¨¯`•. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Hugs & Kisses
     
    g.j.

  16. Sarah says:

    LOL…good one!

  17. Gina says:

    LOL! Oopsy!  Btw, when is your due date?  Still can\’t get over that you\’ve been pregnant for 8 mths! I haven\’t received an email update in awhile. 

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