The Blues

What She Wore: LSU t-shirt, blue jean capris, beaded gold sandals. 


 Well, Charlie was exmined by a doctor who specializes in kids with brain bleeds, and the Early interventionist came out and did an assesment as well.  The results were as follows:
 
Muscle tone and flexibility: a little tight, but overall good.
Fine motor skills: good
Feeding: GREAT–the doctor wants to take out the feeding tube
Social: good
Hearing: good
Gross motor: behind–he should be pushing up and picking up his head, but he isn’t.  We expected this.
Vision:  BAD, BAD, DOUBLE BAD.
 
Charlie sees straight ahead and to his left.  The right side, however, seems to be lacking.  I’ve noticed that that eye wanders a little as well.  If this is his only problem, it’s correctible with surgery.  If he has other problems, he could be looking at a life-time of vision issues. 
 
You would think that I could be happy.  My son is doing great, and the Early Interventionist told me so.  He’s doing better than the doctors ever said he would.  But I am not great.  My heart breaks for my little boy who stares off in one direction.  I want to fix him, heal him, make him better.  I would give my vision for his in a second.  I can do none of these things, however.  I can only wait, and watch, and help him cope with whatever comes his way.  I think he’ll probably handle it better than I do.
 
KM
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About takedeux

In one summer I had a baby who was hospitalized for five weeks, quit my job, and moved back to my hometown. This blog is about starting over.
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19 Responses to The Blues

  1. Christine says:

    You\’re correct.  He will probably handle it better than you.  Even with older children, we parents stand y and want to take away hurt and "fix it."  It is all a day at a time.  Be blessed.
     

  2. Nora says:

    They usually do the little buggers.  I am sure you hear this all the time, but he is so precious.  My oldest is turning five next week and it seriously seems it was just yesterday he was that size. 

  3. Leah says:

    Oh, I know that world. I was legally blind for a long time. Very fuzzy and all, but music! A world without music…horrible. He hears! 🙂

  4. Nadine says:

    ooh he is sooo cute!!! And he is coming along nicely!! He\’ll be fine!!
     Buck up Soldier!! And hug that baby for me.  

  5. Sarah says:

    I understand why you would feel badly about Charlie having vision problems. The thing is, you really have to look on the bright side on this one. Think of how truly bad it could have been for him if all the "what ifs" had come true. If poor vision really is the only problem he ends up with out of this, he\’s one lucky boy. Hang in there and keep counting your blessings. 🙂

  6. Antonella says:

     Katy, first let me say that Charlie is gorgeous!!!
     
    It\’s really terrible about his vision, but at the same time, I\’m happy that everything else seems to be good. I can only imagine how you feel, I cried when Dante had a fever because I felt so bad. Charlie is a fighter and you know that. You guys are in my prayers. Give Charlie a kiss for me and I\’m sending you a great big (((((HUG))))))
    Antonella

  7. Unknown says:

    Charlie is so adorable!! As for his eyesight, he probably will handle it fairly well. Just think of it this way, he doesn\’t know any other kind of vision other than his own. Not to mention that children are surprisingly resilient! I\’ll be keeping you two in my prayers.
     
    Sometimes I wonder about S dealing with having divorced parents at a young age. But then he comes over to my apartment and asks me, "Is this your mommy\’s or your daddy\’s house?" He thinks that everyone lives with either mommy or daddy. What he has a hard time understanding is that I live alone!

  8. Unknown says:

    Charlie is so adorable!! As for his eyesight, he probably will handle it fairly well. Just think of it this way, he doesn\’t know any other kind of vision other than his own. Not to mention that children are surprisingly resilient! I\’ll be keeping you two in my prayers.
     
    Sometimes I wonder about S dealing with having divorced parents at a young age. But then he comes over to my apartment and asks me, "Is this your mommy\’s or your daddy\’s house?" He thinks that everyone lives with either mommy or daddy. What he has a hard time understanding is that I live alone!

  9. Betty says:

    Hi KM,
     
    So happy that you are home in N.O. and that Charlie is doing better than expected.  The first time someone counseled me to take it "a day at a time" I thought, "easy for you to say…"  but taking it a day at a time has helped me tremendously.
     
    Betty

  10. Gina says:

    Charlie is so so handsome! Charlie will lick this vision thing.  He\’s already proved he is a fighter.  Keep working with him, and who knows what will happen! I still keep you guys in my thoughts and prayers.

  11. Joell says:

    I totally understand what you mean.  Even though our situation with our son is different from yours, we are both still mothers and we love our babies and want to make the boo boos all better.  Even when they are 12!   🙂  Yes, he is doing great, and I know you rejoice in that and are grateful beyond belief, but it is still painful to know the struggles he may have.  It\’s okay to feel sad about it– have your moment, hon!  But you will get through it and you will be strong for Charlie and y\’all will overcome any obstacles that come your way.  Remember, it\’s no accident that you have been entrusted with this amazing boy! What Charlie will know is that he has a mama and a daddy who love him and that is what matters.  Chin up!  You are doing a great job.  And he is gorgeous.
    HUGS! 
     

  12. Jaysey says:

     Even with a lifetime of possible vision problems, he sure has a lot going for him.  How wonderful that nearly everything else is checking out as or better than expected.

  13. Becca says:

    You, my friend, are doing what any loving mother does…you worry, and you fret. But you know, if this is the worst that comes out of all this, Charlie is making wonderful strides. Keep looking forward, and know that God does have a grand plan for that little boy. May have been a bumpy entrance into this world, but don\’t you know, he changed your life in so many ways already, hasn\’t he? Could you have seen yourself so fiercely protective of a little one a year or so ago? You are learning so much about life and love with Charlie, and this is another learning lesson, hard as it is for you not to be in control and not be able to fix it. But life is like that for you from now on. You can\’t fix all the little things, and sometimes the big things that come to pass for Charlie, but you can shower him with love and affection and all the wisdom that you and your husband and your family have to share and raise him up to do wonderful things!
     
    Hugs,
    Becca

  14. Aimee says:

     oh sweetheart….it\’s hard when dr\’s find faults in your child…and we would all do anything to help someone we love…you will in time…you will help him to be strong…not matter what life throws at him…cause you like all of us know he is a fighter…
    *~* :o) if you don\’t have a smile to give… :o) I will give you one of mine… :o) *~*
     

  15. Tracy says:

    I understand how you are feeling, but when I read this I thought wow that\’s great he\’s doing so well, after all the stuff the doctors were saying when he was born.  You are right though, he will probably handle it better than you but that\’s okay, you\’re a mom and that\’s how you are supposed to feel. 

  16. Unknown says:

    Thank goodness for the feeding part! He\’s going to grow up a storm!
     
    I don\’t know how to compare to your suffering over not being able to fix his vision right away, but I can tell you that there will be many many more times you will be able to help fix his problems. Why just the other day the GIRL had the other girls in the neighborhood not playing with her…and it was nice to help her fix it.
     
    smile today kiddo you\’ll have lots of chances,
    Mercy

  17. Wahzat says:

    Oh he has gotten so big and nice. 🙂 It is such great news that he is doing great sorry about his vision. K you have been a believer right from the beginning and he is blessed. Continue to take it a day at a time and believe that his vision like him will be stronger.
     
    That being said it is hard not wanting the very best for your children and it is hard hearing such news and wanting someone to prescribe a pill so that it will all go away and things will be \’normal\’. Just know that most days you will count your blessings and then there will be days that the tears will flow just because! (I have a cry fest at least once every six weeks LOL)
     
    Keeping you and Charlie the Strong ( don\’t know why I keep thinking of him like this) in my prayers.
     
    ( As usual I am all over your space sorry hope you have a great weekend)

  18. Ami says:

    I didn\’t read through all of the comments, so I\’m not sure what\’s already been said, but I\’ll put my two cents in anyway. First, I\’m so happy that Charlie is doing so well! What a blessing to see such progress. Second, kids are way more resilient than we give them credit for. Not to mention that they easily learn to compensate for things like vision problems. My nephew was born with blindness in one eye and deafness in one ear, and other than some sensory issues and a bit of a developmental delay, you\’d never know. Sure, he needs to sit in the front of the classroom, it took him a little longer to learn to talk, and sometimes you have to repeat yourself so he can hear you, but for the most part, he\’s a normal 8 year old boy. I\’m sure Charlie will be just fine, and you\’ll learn to let him cope with it in his own way. You\’re a great mom!

  19. Aunt says:

    stopping by with hugs. took a little time here to catch up. the Lord bless you with peace, strength, wisdom and joy. 

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