Half Blog

What She Wore: blue jean capris; white tee; red, short-sleeve jacket with white polka dots; red canvas flats with a peep-toe and a bow.

I don’t think I’ve written a blog here that I’m really happy with in a long time.  My favorite entries are always the ones that feel real–that capture how I’m feeling.  The thing is, how I’m feeling is all over the place.  I can be completely joyful about finding that perfect house, and then break down into tears when Charlie needs surgery.  I’m lost in medical jargon and don’t always know which end is up.  I get a new haircut and feel like a million bucks.  I’m grateful to be home with Charlie, but miss my job like crazy.  I rediscover an old friends and get all fired up.  I see someone out with their "normal" children and get angry.  I feel as if I have endless possibilities and am worried that my son will be so limited in his. 
I don’t know which end is up.  I wish I could get it all out in a way that makes sense.
I guess this will have to do.
PS: Still not sure when surgery will be–Tue or Friday–our preference is Friday, but we’ll see if the surgeon is willing.

About takedeux

In one summer I had a baby who was hospitalized for five weeks, quit my job, and moved back to my hometown. This blog is about starting over.
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5 Responses to Half Blog

  1. g says:

    Good luck and my prayers are with you.

  2. siobhan says:

    All my prayers for your family.  Good luck on the house too.  I know what you mean about the kitchen.  If the kitchen isn\’t right, the house isn\’t right!
    God Bless

  3. Nora says:

    Same here.  I have to admit I would love to have something pithy to say that made a difference.  I don\’t, I am glad you can vent and we can drop by and "listen"  I\’ll keep Charlie in my prayers this week.

  4. Nadine says:

    Okay kiddo! That is what this blog is all about. get it all out. It may not make sense or organized but get it all out!
    When I was in therapy, she told me to write it all out. keep a journal. I was bitter. I was hurt. And it helped. If you do not want the world to see it, keep it to yourself. I will understand that. There is so much that goes thru my brain that I don\’t put in a blog…I just stick to humor. And that is good medicine too.
    I see that you are slowly moving things to the other spot. It will all come together.
    Hang in There!

  5. Gina says:

    You life has changed in so many ways, your roller coaster emotions and feelings are understandable.  Keep writing and talking about it. 
    Building on what Nadine said, you can always write something down and burn it or shred it after.  I\’d imagine that it would be freeing to get everything pent up – out.
    Be well, Katy.

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